Oh God, come to my assistance... oh Lord, make haste to help me
I was born on October 2, 1966, which means that in a matter of days I will be 39 years old. I was baptized as an infant in a Catholic Church. I was raised Catholic, in somewhat of a nominal environment at times, but Catholic it was.
My earliest memories of Catholicism consist of being entranced by the mystery of the whole thing. And being bored too. I was a kid, what can I say :) I was an altar boy, so I got an up close and personal look at the inner workings of the Mass. If I try hard I can remember the names of the priests. Father Alexander was from the old school. He insisted on teaching all of the catechism classes. Father Barbernitz trained the altar boys and took us to the ice cream parlor. Father Bob Wenz worked with the teenagers. Each brought their own flavor to the proceedings.
When I became too old to be an altar boy, I became a lector. At the time I don’t believe St. Mary’s church had too many teenage lectors, if any. I remember one other. This occurred at the same time I was forming a faith life of my own. I became a born-again Christian as a sophomore in high school, and the Word of God took on an increasing importance to me. I brought that sense of reverence and importance, added a dash of zeal, and proclaimed the readings at Mass. Public speaking became a talent that I still pride myself on. Even now I apply the skills I was taught as a lector whenever I have the chance to speak before a group. I am more confident in public speaking than I am talking one on one.
At the same time I was lecturing at Mass, I was embarking on the journey that has made up the bulk of this blog. For a time I attended an Assembly of God church and a Catholic church simultaneously, but the flash and pizzazz of Pentecostal worship was wooing my heart. I finally decided that I had had enough; Mass was boring, even with my flair and style added to the mix, and besides, it wasn’t Biblical.
I’m not going to recap every stop on the road. You can read the archives for that. At this point in the road I have realized one thing- I’m tired of the journey. I’m ready for the destination. And I believe I am at that destination- one which I rejected several times but always stayed in the background, ready and waiting for me to return. On the verge of turning 39 I have decided on one last stop. I have returned full circle. What I thought wasn’t Biblical turned out to be exactly that- very Biblical.
I’m returning to the Roman Catholic Church.
This blog, therefore, might not even be necessary anymore. After all, I started it to map out my journey. I started it to share my experiences with God and church, and I think I have done a more than adequate job of that. But that chapter is closing now. I’m not going to offer a meandering apologetic statement to justify my move- there are sites out there that do a lot better job of that kind of thing than I could ever do.
I’m not sure where I’m going with this. I’m not a grand theologian, I’m not a political commentator, I’m never going to be cool as the culture might define it at any given moment in time.
I’m just a guy.
See you on the other side.
My earliest memories of Catholicism consist of being entranced by the mystery of the whole thing. And being bored too. I was a kid, what can I say :) I was an altar boy, so I got an up close and personal look at the inner workings of the Mass. If I try hard I can remember the names of the priests. Father Alexander was from the old school. He insisted on teaching all of the catechism classes. Father Barbernitz trained the altar boys and took us to the ice cream parlor. Father Bob Wenz worked with the teenagers. Each brought their own flavor to the proceedings.
When I became too old to be an altar boy, I became a lector. At the time I don’t believe St. Mary’s church had too many teenage lectors, if any. I remember one other. This occurred at the same time I was forming a faith life of my own. I became a born-again Christian as a sophomore in high school, and the Word of God took on an increasing importance to me. I brought that sense of reverence and importance, added a dash of zeal, and proclaimed the readings at Mass. Public speaking became a talent that I still pride myself on. Even now I apply the skills I was taught as a lector whenever I have the chance to speak before a group. I am more confident in public speaking than I am talking one on one.
At the same time I was lecturing at Mass, I was embarking on the journey that has made up the bulk of this blog. For a time I attended an Assembly of God church and a Catholic church simultaneously, but the flash and pizzazz of Pentecostal worship was wooing my heart. I finally decided that I had had enough; Mass was boring, even with my flair and style added to the mix, and besides, it wasn’t Biblical.
I’m not going to recap every stop on the road. You can read the archives for that. At this point in the road I have realized one thing- I’m tired of the journey. I’m ready for the destination. And I believe I am at that destination- one which I rejected several times but always stayed in the background, ready and waiting for me to return. On the verge of turning 39 I have decided on one last stop. I have returned full circle. What I thought wasn’t Biblical turned out to be exactly that- very Biblical.
I’m returning to the Roman Catholic Church.
This blog, therefore, might not even be necessary anymore. After all, I started it to map out my journey. I started it to share my experiences with God and church, and I think I have done a more than adequate job of that. But that chapter is closing now. I’m not going to offer a meandering apologetic statement to justify my move- there are sites out there that do a lot better job of that kind of thing than I could ever do.
I’m not sure where I’m going with this. I’m not a grand theologian, I’m not a political commentator, I’m never going to be cool as the culture might define it at any given moment in time.
I’m just a guy.
See you on the other side.
posted by The Man at 10:35 AM
3 Comments:
Even though I have had to play catchup, it has been interesting to read your blog. I am a Byzantine Catholic Priest, and sort of have the best of two of the worlds in which you have journeyed - Catholic in jurisdiction and Orthodox in worship and spirituality. May God continue to guide you, and may you always be open to what He is telling you.
Kind of interesting to overhear a conversation about me :)
I've been accused of constantly trying to find the perfect church. I will accept that criticism to an extent. I have had the tendency to flit around from flower to flower like a spiritual hummingbird.
But I had good intentions. I wanted to do what was biblical, which is what every Christian wants (theoretically). I just wanted to be at the church that taught what the Bible taught. How do I know that what I believe is Biblical if I don't examine what the other guy has to say? That isn't "always looking for the perfect church," that's discernment.
Steve, you said that I should stay in the Word and focus on Christ. It's not that easy. Unless we are gifted to become a hermit, we have to fellowship with other Christians. To that extent we have to focus on something that is not Christ. We have to have some criteria with which we decide to fellowship with one group of Christians and not another. I obviously can't fellowship with everyone- I have to have a place to go on Sunday. Everyone says they only focus on Christ. Everyone says they go merely by the Word of God. How best to discern? That is focusing on something that is not Christ.
In the multitude of competing choices I chose one.
"Scott,
First... I hope you haven't take any umbrage in my comment about "finding the perfect church". None is intended."
It's actually Sean, not Scott :)
No umbrage taken. If I responded in a fiery way it's because I've heard the "perfect church" comment before, and it usually goes like this. They say there's no perfect church. I say, "OK, since there's no perfect church, I will pick... this one." And of course that person has a dozen different arguments why the one I chose shouldn't be the one.
"All I wanted to stress was, just because you have picked this one, don't give up your own analysis of what is being presented."
Trust me- you never have to worry about Sean L. MacNair failing to ask the questions that set people on edge :)
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